“Seriously.”
I stared at her in the darkness. Only the street lamp and the dashboard lights of her car shone on our faces. We’d been sitting outside my house, talking, for an hour. I sighed softly and put my hand on the door handle.
“Write something,” she said. “Write something every day.”
Do you remember when I used to blog?
I mean, back when I used to REALLY blog?
I was going through some old posts today, doing prep work for another post for another blog, and ended up in September 2007. You want to know how many times I hit that publish button during this very same month two years ago? TWENTY-ONE. I know. That means I actually posted more often than, you know, once every other week.
To say I’m not sure what happened would be a lie.
You long time readers will know that I used to write almost every week day. I kept up with my friends’ blogs, I responded to my own comments, I followed new readers back to their own bloggish places and formed relationships. I have dozens of good friends today that I know solely through and because of this five year blogging gig.
But that was then. Back when blogging was just about blogging. It was just about the sheer fun of it.
Due to the nature of the internet, the face of blogging began to change. It evolved into something I didn’t recognize. No longer was it about the relationships, or about the writing, or even about showing Grandma the most recent pictures. It started as a trickle that became an ocean; “the business side of blogging.” The levels varied from blog to blog–some barely dipped their toes in the water, while others threw themselves into the waves. And before I knew it, on my own level in my own corner of the internet, I was sucked into the vortex.
The American Dream is all about taking the things you love doing, your hobbies, and finding a way to make money from them and then being known for how well you’ve accomplished this, isn’t it? And yet, we all know where that leads… we’ve either seen it happen or done it ourselves. It isn’t long before the thing you love becomes the thing you loathe. Why should the sphere of blogging often known as “momtrepreneurs” be any different?
By the time I realized I’d unknowingly changed directions–whether or not it was perceptible to others outside the obvious of putting up ads, it was there in my mentality and focus–I was already turning back the other way. I was tired of having a purpose to blogging other than writing. Writing was the reason I’d started doing this in the first place, and all the other… stuff… made me want to stop altogether. Bloggity friends were still having fun with all of it, but I wasn’t. So I changed the way I handled pitch emails, and cut out anything having to do with money, “rank” or count–except my ads (which required no action on my part or my readers’) and my good ol’ stat counter kept for safety purposes. And then I spent months considering whether or not to just scratch the whole thing and throw the blog down the drain.
Meanwhile, John came home from Iraq and I took most of August and September of last year off from my typical blogging schedule, just to get used to being a family again. But you know how when you’re running or biking or whatever, it’s always harder to stop and start than to just keep going? Same with me when it comes to blogging. I was just starting to get the hang of it again when the storm of my parents’ ending marriage began, consuming me for months. I didn’t know how to write about it. I still don’t. I don’t know if anyone would really even care to hear about it. Who needs to hear about the mess in someone else’s family when surely they have one in their own? So I held back.
This blog has seen seven new posts since June. A number of the blogs I read haven’t had very many more. People are tweeting more than they’re writing.
The face of blogging is changing… again.
The blogs that remain are the ones written by people who want relationship. Who want a place to sort out their hearts through a keyboard. Who love blogging simply for what it inherently is. A place to love others, to share a message, to write.
And I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to jump in. Again.
Consider this your cue to expect more action around here. Whether or not anyone is still hanging around, or whether what is written is anything those stragglers want to read, I’ll be here… just writing.










Glad to have you back, Ash. :) I love reading your blog, no matter how much or how little you write. You know why? Because I care about you. Those who continue reading it will feel the same way. :)
You're right. In the end, it's the writing that matters. Not the business or the numbers or the money. Just the writing. Writing is a release, a way for us to make sense of our lives and also a way to preserve memories.
I love you, my dear sweet friend, and I truly hope you can get back to "just writing" and enjoy it as much as ever. :)
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I'm a long time lurker, now emerging from the shadows to say I was glad to read your ending statement. :) I love your posts. I don't read very many blogs… I read my friends' blogs (like the real-life-see-them-face-to-face type of friends), and a few others that grabbed my attention from the get-go. Yours is one of my favorites!
Keep on!
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:) I can't wait…to read! Hope it inspires me to write mine again. I still can't "face" my blog these days…though I miss it terribly. It's painful because it's linked to simpler times that are now gone.
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Another long time (like more than 3 years) lurker here. I read your birth stories when I was pregnant, your beautiful pictures when John left and returned touched me, I was always excited to see a new post. When I started using Google Reader you were one of the first blogs I added of people that I don't know in 'real' life. I kept you on my reader throughout your breaks, and though I understood why they were happening I did miss your blog. So I am happy to see you back!
I agree with you on the 'business' side, I tend to stop reading blogs when it gets in the way. I have never noticed it in the way on your blog, but I can understand how it would be in your way. Which means I like your decision, because I like what you write, so I am excited to read more. :)
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I love your blog! So do all my sisters.
I thought I'd leave these verses.
"For thou wilt light my candle:the Lord my God will enlighten my darkness…as for God, His way is perfect:the word of the Lord is tried: He is a buckler to all those that trust in Him" (Ps. 18:28,30)
If you want, you can visit our family blog, huronfamily.blogspot.com
Blessings,
Olivia
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Ashleigh – I have been reading for a few years too. I thoroughly enjoy it and it has come to be quite personal to me because my long time in ministry parents have recently split. You were at one stage the only person I knew alive who had gone through this and just know I was not the only one was so helpful in the grief. Keep writing girl, I have such respect for your journey. The stories our lives tell lift others up to new heights and although sometimes it is raw and uncomfortable, it is a gift. xx
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Yay!! I look forward to hearing more from you.
I know I go back and forth between wanting to be a blog that stands out from the rest and just wanting to be a place to put my thoughts and hopefully encourage others along the way…
I am learning to be content to let God do whatever He chooses with the blog and to just be content to post, whatever…Not to try to keep up with the "bloggy Jones'".
I love your writing style…and as a homeschool Mom I love that you are such a great testimony for graduated homeschoolers. Keep up the great work.
Becky K.
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Wow, you sure hit the nail on the head. Sometimes even amongst us plain folk bloggers I feel the same sense of numbers, numbers, numbers. Who has so many comments, and this many hits, and on it goes. Instead of the writing. Instead of not really caring who reads it, or who comments because sometimes you just have to share what's going on. Do you know how many times God has totally blessed me by the words someone else has shared about their very real day to day? Countless! It is about relationships, camaraderie, and the neighbor across the fence type goodness that comes from it all. You lift me up, I lift you up, and when neither one feels like lifting anything, you know there's a prayer that will reach the ears of Heaven. That's what blogging oughta be about. Not that you asked me, but I'm amen'ing you over here. I enjoy reading what you have to say, and I'm glad you're keeping at it!
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I am glad you have decided to come back. I hear you about the changes of blogging. I have been through the roller coaster you are talking about. Take your time. And, Dear, if you need a 'vent' post, it's really OK. It's your blog and I am sure most people that frequent this blog really do care and pray for you regularly. :-)
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Hey Ashleigh, I've been a lurker for a while, but this seems like a good time to come out and introduce myself. I started reading your blog around about June of last year and thought you seemed like a like-able person. I was also working on a marine base at the time, so even though I have no clue and I know it, talk about your husband being gone touched a chord. Near the end of the year I set up google reader, even though you weren't posting much I included you, and it was always a pleasant surprise when a post popped up. It will be a pleasure to hear more from you. I'll try to comment more so the relationship is actually that instead of stalking. By the way, I did comment a couple of times, but as The Random Muse. I've had to abandon my old blog and usernames because of some personal issues.
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I know what you mean about lots of blogs disappearing lately. I'm glad you've decided to stick around. Just write because you want to write and the rest will sort itself out (hopefully :))
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I am here to write too, and to share. I just do not want to get caught up in the other stuff. Like you, I have made so many wonderful friends, and everyone seems to be slowing down a little. Maybe at times there are things we cannot share, and then other times when we think we have nothing worthwhile to say….BUT if we are here simply because we love writing, and love the relationship we have with our readers/friends, it shouldn't matter at all.
So I look forward to loads more writing and reading! It is good to have you back.
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Glad to have you back!
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I'm so glad your back! I started reading your blog last year when John was in Iraq and I have really enjoyed it. I always feel like we have so much in common,both married "young", both same age, both have 2 young kids around the same age, both homemakers, and similar family stuff. Anyways, it's such a treat reading about your life, and am thankful you are going to be around more!
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I'm so glad you are making this choice. I have noticed the slowing down in blog world and it has made me sad. I have slowed down myself due to my own family crisis I have been going through. But I won't quit – because I just have to write. I may have slowed down – but I'm not quitting either.
Your blog has blessed my heart and the hearts of my daughters many, many times. I'm so glad you are going to continue.
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Amen, Ashleigh! I was reminded this week that my reasons for starting my own blog several months ago, I have not held to. So I have started with new resolve to post more frequently. I fully enjoy all your posts and even when they have been few and far between, I have always looked forward to your new ones, because I knew it would be worth the wait. Even if it was just little things about the kids, because they always brighten my day. :) Keep writing, you are gifted. :)
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Honestly, I had no idea you made money off of your blogging, Ash. Wow. I wonder how one would do such a thing… I've missed your more regular posts…as we all get more and more busy, I appreciate these little ways to stay in touch with the ones I've come to know and love through the internet.
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I first heard of your blog a couple of years through ylcf and have been following ever since. Like several others have posted- I get so excited when one of your posts pops up in my google reader. I laugh out loud at some of them and nod in understanding at others. Looking forward to reading many more "humble little ramblings"! Please keep them coming!
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Glad to see you'll be back and posting. I've been blogging for several years, first with LiveJournal and then with Blogger. I've noticed people shifting over to Facebook mostly, but I prefer blogs. :) I think the relationships we build through blogs are great and I hope that it continues, even as blogging and the internet evolves.
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I love reading your posts- they make me smile and are an encouragement. Glad to hear you are planning to post more!!
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I am so glad that you are going to do more writing. I don't remember how I found your blog, but I have loved everything you have written…the good and the not so good.
Looking forward to reading more of what you write.
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I realized a while back that if I'm blogging for any other reason than my own creative output and enjoyment, then, well, it's just not the right place for me.
Looking forward to what you have to say. You make me laugh!
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I'm glad to read this post; it'll be great to see you writing again! You've always made me laugh and inspired me to write more. I have a Google Reader account through which I follow your blog and I always wonder when I'm signing in if you're going to have a post. If you do, I always save yours to the very last to enjoy it. =) (By the way, I met you through "The King's Daughter" years ago!) I've been praying for you, too! May God bless you and yours!
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YAY! So happy to hear that your will be blogging more often, though I completely understand your need for a break. I have been lurking here for a few years – I linked from YLCF. I enjoy reading about your life and seeing the pictures of your family boys (they boys adorable!) God bless you!
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Yay! Can't wait to read more! Always!!! Always you make me think! Once again I am going to try to do better! And write on my blog more often. Just because I LOVE writing!
Ginger~
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I'm so glad you'll be writing more! I've always loved reading your posts! I love the way you write. Like you're actually talking to people. :)
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Yoohoo!
Let's say it together:
MORE POSTS! MORE POSTS! MORE POSTS!
Yaaaayyyyy!!!
:)
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I'm glad you're still here! I've been a long time lurker but enjoy reading everything you put up. So I'm looking forward to more. : )
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This post made me very happy. :)
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so thankful. yes. this 50+ chickie is thankful.
jAne
tickleberry farm
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Just writing is what I love best.
Love you bunches….
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I didn't know you made money off your blog either… I guess I am behind the times on that sort of stuff ;) (hehe, maybe that's why I stuck to LJ..)
But yes, please do write. Anything. I love your style of writing! and you always makes me laugh and smile and encourage me.
I'm happy to see you back :)
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oh yes, and Christine (above) is a friend of mine IN REAL Life =D
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So glad you are getting back to just doing what you love…. :):):)
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I agree with you, Cassandra. Although I have a Facebook page, I much prefer blogging! :)
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You DO have a gift for writing, my friend. Keep it up. Don't let tweets/status updates and shortened version of internet communication overtake your blogging. You do it well. I have dove into facebook, but will NOT do the twitter thing, nope, just won't. :-)
Think of you often, and pray for you all.
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