I have an obsession with knowing exactly what my temperature is when I’m sick. And then I like to announce it to the world.

Ah, drama, thou art my friend.

So I always keep my thermometer nearby when I have a fever and take my temperature every hour. At least.

(Or, “temp-er-uh-toor,” as my southern Grammie would say. Since I like to pretend I’m southern, I like to say it that way too. In So Cal.)

It seems I’ve been hit with Hand, Foot and Mouth disease, caught from my boys. Troy had it a couple weeks ago. Then a week ago, after we all spent a weekend together, my dad came down with it (or, at least, something like it–we’re still not sure about what he had), then my brother did, and then, back here at our house, Merritt did. So I spent the second half of my bloggie break tending a poor, sick Baby Tiny.

He’s all better now, but, me–not so much. Troy went to my parents’ house for the night, so I actually only have one child–an infant who can barely scoot, at that. Which, if you’re a mother, you’ll know can be a helpful thing when Mama’s not feeling so hot.

Er, uh, IS feeling hot, literally. Hot, only as in temperature, of course. The sweats and USMC sweatshirt make sure of that.

So anyway. Moving right along.

Here’s my question.

Who on earth decided Mother’s Day should be on a Sunday?

Because, yesterday morning, I was ready to talk to the President about switching it to another day of the week. Saturday would be nice.

I love Sundays, I truly do. BUT, the hour before we walk out the door is the absolute hardest hour (typically) of my entire week. It doesn’t matter HOW early I get up, or HOW prepared I am. It’s just always crazy right before we leave.

A few of us agreed during Sunday School yesterday that the reason it’s on a Sunday to TEST us moms in our great and awesome mothering skills. Mmmhmm.

Because, let me just tell you, I was Top Mom yesterday. Oh yes I was.

I was Top Mom during that hour before we left. When Troy decided listening was optional and Merritt decided crying was mandatory. When we dealt with a meltdown and the “consequences” of said meltdown. Because we all know Top Mom would, of course, get completely frustrated, put the toddler in his crib just to contain him for a few minutes while she dresses the baby, grabs diapers for the diaper bag, answers the phone, and tries to find a pacifier, and then tell the baby that crying for no reason is just not acceptable in this house, fully expecting him to understand. Right?

And I was Top Mom after church, when I went in to check on Troy during his nap and found him asleep with his hand, once again, covered in poop.

Ahem. AHEM. A-HEM!!!

WHAT IS THIS CHILD’S PROBLEM??????

I was Top Mom as I cleaned his hand, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. This was the fourth time he’s done this. FOURTH TIME, peeps. What on the face of the earth is he thinking??

He’s been disciplined. He’s been talked to. He’s been checked on and his dirty diaper changed before he falls asleep.

And then, he did it again. Today. Only this time, it wasn’t during his nap. It was in the middle of the day. He just came up to me, held up his hand and said, “Eeewy, Mommy. Hand diapie. Eewy.”

I was Top Mom dealing with that one, too.

Fun times in our house.

Let me just tell you this, peeps. I know for a fact I’m anything BUT Top Mom. Oh, and what my mom said? Ha.

Ha. Ha. That’s funny. REAL funny.

But Mother’s Day is fun. If only to remind us that when all is said and done, and with all the gifts, cards, nice dinners with family, flowers from husbands in the Sandy Spot, hugs and kisses aside… we’re still just moms. Just making the world go round. Up all night with feverish babies. Catching our kids’ illnesses.

And wiping poop off the hands of sleeping toddlers.

Nothing like coming back with a bang, huh?

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