Meet Freddie Joe:

Freddie Joe was a birthday gift given to a Certain Two-year-old by his Beloved seventeen-year-old Uncle. Freddie Joe was thus named upon the opening of the box containing him, when the Beloved Uncle said, “Hey, look, it’s Freddie Joe!” And since everything the Beloved Uncle says is gospel truth in the life of the two-year-old, the little plastic fellow was promptly christened “Freddie Joe.”

(Although in the common dialect, it’s pronounced more like “Funny Doe.”)

This occurrence might also provide some insight into the reason the two-year-old’s vocabulary also includes phrases such as, “Sweet Dude!” And, “Peace out, homie.”

Thank you, Beloved Uncle. We shall be eternally grateful.

Today Freddie Joe was taken to visit to King Merritt Will.

(Although in the common dialect, it’s pronounced more like “Mer-nitt Wee-oh.”)

The resident photo-journalist tagged along, as well. Actually, she was folding laundry as Freddie Joe was unfolding his adventures, and as any good photo-journalist would do, she grabbed her camera to catch the action as it happened.
King Mer-nitt Wee-oh gave his orders. “Go now, and find many sights as of yet unseen, Freddie Joe!”

(Which, in the common dialect, sounds a little more like, “Mm, gmm, aaaaaah, agh, eeee, oooh.”)

So Freddie Joe (“Funny Doe”) backed his fancy-schmancy car out of King Mer-nitt Wee-oh’s court and headed off.

He was ready to see the world and find the sights unseen! He quickly zoomed over the patches of colored earth, with his driver all the while crying, “FffffUNNY Doe!! FfffUNNY Doe!”
All was well, but then…

Freddie Joe began to slip down the side of the hill. Oh no, Funny Doe!!

Down, down, down, d-o-o-o-w-w-w-n-n went Freddie Joe.

And our poor hero, Freddie Joe (“Funny Doe”), landed in a cave and met his untimely demise at the hands of the Great Grey Gracie-cat.

THE END

Oh, wait–hold that–this isn’t the end…

Because once the story of Freddie Joe came to an end, the photo-journalist (aka, Mama) said to Freddie Joe’s driver (aka, Troy), “Okay, let’s come clean up the legos…”

The response: “Okay, A’leigh. Okay, A’leigh!”

AHEM.

You may be two. You may be a big boy now. You may even be the driver of the famed Freddie Joe.

But that’s Mama to you, Buster.

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